Funny SMS Collection-01

Funny sms-01.

What happened 2 ur mobile? I was trying 2 call u but I got this msg: welcome 2 Da jungle network, Da monkey u r trying 2 call is on da tree plz try later.

Funny sms-02.

Clouds r white but the sky is blue, monkey like u should b kept in the zoo, don’t get
angry ull find me there 2, not in the cage but laughing at u. ha! ha! ha

Funny sms-03

I am in hospital now. After 5 minutes, I will be transferred 2 a surgery room. The doctor told me, I will die if I stop RECEIVING YOUR SMS.

Funny sms-04.

If u fall in river there is a boat.If u fall in well there is a rope. But if u fall in love there is no hope

Funny sms-05.

If U delete this message thats bcoz u love me. .. If u save it thats bcoz u desire me .. & if u ignore it thats bcoz u miss me. So what u gonna do with It?

Funny sms collection- 2

Funny SMS-06.

Do u believe in love at first sight? Or do I have 2 say the 3 sweet words later?

Funny SMS-07.

Love is sweet poison, do not consume without ur wife .Consume it in a cool n dark place.

Funny SMS-08.

If u love someone, put their name in a circle, instead of a heart, because hearts can break, but circles go on forever

Funny SMS-09.

L O V E .. L = Lot of Sorrows. O = Ocean of Tears. V = Valley of Death. E = End of life....

Funny SMS-10.

u must be a good runner cos u r  always running in my mind, u must be a good thief cos u have stolen my heart, n I am always a bad shooter cos I Always Miss u.

Funny sms collection- 3

Funny SMS-11.

If u feel little bored, little sick, little sad, Don’t be afraid, U know what’s wrong?
U r suffering from lack of Vitamin ‘ME’

Funny SMS-12.

In da morning I dont eat bcos I think of u, at noon I dont eat bcos I think of u,in da evening I dont eat bcos I think of u,at night I dont slep bcos I m hungry.

Funny SMS-13.

It must have been a rainy day when u were born, but it wasn't really rain, the sky was crying bcos it lost her most beautiful angel.

Funny SMS-14.

Do U know the full form of COLLEGE? Come On, Lets Love Each Girl Equally. That’s why boys go 2 college regularly.

Funny SMS-15.

If ur world is spinning Round & Round.Ur heart is beating fast,do u think its LOVE? No friend noo, its called high B/P.

Funny sms collection- 4

Funny SMS-16.

Last night I lay in my bed looking at the beautiful stars, the moon n the sky. Then I thought where the fucking roof?

Funny SMS-17.

I m a killer, I kill people 4 money, but u r my friend so I’ll KILL U 4 FREE!!

Funny SMS-18.

First the friendship ring, 2^nd the Love ring, 3^rd the engagement ring, 4^th the wedding ring, then the suffering

Funny SMS-19.

At dis moment 100 million people r sleeping, 2 million people r eating 3 million people r having sex.. & 1 stupid fool is reading my SMS

Funny SMS-20.

I want u 2 know dat our friendship means a lot 2 me. U cry I cry. U lauf I lauf. U jump out of da window. I look down & den. I lauf again.

Funny sms collection- 5

Funny SMS-21.

><(((:>I send dis fish as a sign of friendship Plz take care of it & keep it in mobile & daily put ur mobile in water so tat fish wont DIE

Funny SMS-22.

Without Love -- days r
Sadday,
moanday,
tearsday,
wasteday,
thirstday,
frightday,
shatterday.

so be in Luv everyday.

Funny SMS-23.

One day Raja n rani decided 2 send messages 2 each other by using Pigeon instead of mobile. The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message. He angried n called 2 rani.She told stupid "That was a miss call"

Funny SMS-24.

Dear user, ur wife can become mother without ur struggle! Just SMS 'CHILD' or call customer care at 0088****** & be a tension-free DAD!

Funny SMS-25.

A couple printed invitation letter 4 their son’s khatna(Circumcision),but they don’t know proper word 2 print, so they printed:THE CUTTING CEREMONY OF FUCKING INSTRUMENTS

Funny sms collection- 6

Funny SMS-26.

Smiling is the second best thing u can do by ur lips, Of course u know the 1st...? Stop thinking weird... stupid its keeping ur mouth shut..

Funny SMS-27.

U can fall from a bridge, u can fall from above, but the best way of falling,
is falling in love!

Funny SMS-28.

u r genius, ur mind is a master piece.It is divided into left n right.In the left part nothing is right n in right part nothing is left.

Funny SMS-29.

Meaning of  WIFE & HUSBAND..
w>Wonderful
I>Item
f>4
e>Entertainment
.....
h>Handsome
u>Useful
s>Smart
b>But
a>At
n>Night
d>Dangerous

Funny SMS-30.

Keep.....................IN TOUCH WID ME.....OTHERWISE............................1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 ALL..........UR TEETH WILL B BROKEN!!!

Funny sms collection- 7

Funny SMS-31

First the friendship ring, 2^nd the Love ring, 3^rd the engagement ring, 4^th the wedding ring, then the suffering

Funny SMS-32

womens  r like  internet    virus  1st they enter ur life scan urs pockets transfer money edit ur mind  download thier  problems delete  ur smile  n hang  ur life   from  ss

Funny SMS-33

IMAGEINE IF NO GIRL IN WORLD
RESULT:
NO SMS
NO FLOWER
NO VALENTINE'S
NO CANDLES
NO PERFUME
NO TRAVELLING
NO TAJ MEHAL
ALL THE MEN
GO DIRECT IN
HEVEN

Funny SMS-34

Hey can u do me a favour, take a pic of urself n send me it, I'm playin cards n I'm
missin the joker!!

Funny SMS-35

Sending u my bed 2 let u rest, pillows 2 give u comfort n my blanket 2 keep u warm. I can't sleep now coz' I've lent u all my things already. Gd nite! I love u.

Funny sms collection- 8

Funny SMS-36.

Girl: It’s 2 tight,

Boy: Don’t worry,

Girl: I am getting hart,

Boy: I m doing slowly,

Girl: It’s painful,

Boy: ok, take another ring

Funny SMS-37.

When u feel lonely
n alone & cannot see any one around u,
the world seems 2 be fading away,  come along with me I’ll take u 2 an eye specialist!

Funny SMS-38.

If I was an artist,
u would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
u would be my inspiration!
If I was an author u would be my story!
But I'm only a cartoonist!

Funny SMS-39

Boy: I am not rich like my friend Sumon, I don't even have a car like Sumon. But I really love u! Girl: I love u too, but give me Sumon’s Ph number.

Funny SMS-40.

Dream makes everything possible, Hope makes everything work, Luv makes everything beautiful, Smile makes all the above... So always Brush ur Teeth

Funny sms collection- 9

Funny SMS-41.

Always start ur day with a lot of S E X
S-mile
E-nergy
X-citement
so make SEX a daily habit, & u'll always be happy!

Funny SMS-42.

Wana romance in the evening today?
I'm in a good mood
Just a little bit of kissing n biting
reply me soon!
urs lovingly
"MOSQUITO"

Funny SMS-43.

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence 4 2 minutes.

Funny SMS-44.

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards?
Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says '2 the only boy I ever loved'
Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.

Funny SMS-45.

Beauty is not how u look, it is not how handsome u r, it is not ur figure too... Beauty is the inner self, so change ur underwear daily.

Funny sms Collection- 10

Funny SMS-46.

Always start ur day with a lot of S E X
S-mile
E-nergy
X-citement
so make SEX a daily habit, & u'll always be happy!

Funny SMS-47.

Good news! A new way 2 send Romantic kiss 2 ur girlfriend. Just call me n order ur kiss. I will personally go n deliver it.

Funny SMS-48.

Mon 2 Sun, From Jan 2 Dec, From birth till my death, my feelings 4 u have never changed. 4 me, u've always been a headache!

Funny SMS-49.

A baby fish asked her mother: Y can't we live on earth?
Mother Fish: Earth is not the place 4 FISH, it's made 4 selfish.

Funny SMS-50.

What's the difference between wife n neighbours wife?
Wife is a chocolate, can have any time. Neighbour's wife is like an ice-cream, shud hv immediately.

Funny sms Collection 11

Funny SMS-51.

My Eyes: 2 look at u, Hands: 2 pray 4 u, Mind: 2 care 4 u, Heart: 2 love u n Legs: 2 kick u if u forget me.

Funny SMS-52.

Do u know similarity between Dinosaurs n Decent Girls?
Both don't exist.

Funny SMS-53.

I want u...
2 be with me In a nice Restaurent
2 have candle light dinner....
n 2 say say those sweet three words 2 U....
"Pay The Bill"

Funny SMS-54.

Intelligent Man + Intelligent Woman = Romance.

Intelligent Man + Stupid Woman = Pregnancy.

Stupid Man + Intelligent Woman = Affair.

Stupid Man + Stupid Woman = Marriage !

Funny SMS-55.

A mobile is like women:-
Talks non-stop,
Costs a fortune,
Disturbs when ur busy
N when U need them urgently, they have no service.

Funny sms Collection-12

Funny SMS-56.

One day I read smoking is bad, I stopped smoking. one day I read drinking is bad, I stopped drinking. one day I read SEX is bad, I stopped reading

Funny SMS-57.

Not every flower can represent love but rose do it. Not every tree can live without water, but cactus do it. Not every monkey can read SMS but u do! Enjoy ur day, n don’t forget 2 smile!

Funny SMS-58.

Do u know whats A B C D E F G?
A Boy Can Do Everything 4 Girl

Now reverse da order, can u guess the full form of: G F E D C B A ?
Girls Forgets Everything Done & Catches (new) Boy Again.

Funny SMS-59.

“Miss me” or “Hate me”,
Both r in my favour.

If u miss me,I ‘m always in ur heart.
If u hate me,I’ll always be in ur mind.

Funny SMS-60.

Ur aim in life shud b 54321..
I mean…

5- Five digit salary
4- Four wheeler vehicle
3- Three room flat
2- 2 cute children
&
1- One sweetheart

Funny sms Collection-13

Funny SMS-61.

I decided 2 send u the cutest
n sweetest gift of the world.
But the postman shouted at me saying,
Get out of the post box.

Funny SMS-62.

Life is cricket
Don’t lose ur wicket
Try 2 get century
Never 4get ur boundry
Even if u r run out
Never become mood out
BeCoz GoD Is 3Rd umpire.

Funny SMS-63.

Hi…

Today she was asking me ur details.
I gave her ur cell number.
she will be visiting u soon.

Her name is
.
.
.
* SMILE *

I think she came just now!

Funny SMS-64.

Beautiful Pictures r Devolped
from Negatives in a Dark Room.
So, if U see Darkness in ur Life
be sure that God is making
a Beautiful Picture 4 U!

Funny SMS-65.

Do u know whats the meaning of FAMILY?

F=father
A=n
M=mother
I=I
L=love
Y=u

Funny sms Collection-14

Funny SMS-66.

Sending u 100,00,000 smiles,
Take 1 4 now * keep the
remaining 99,99,999 under ur pillow,
pick out 1 every morning bcoz
I want 2 cu smiling always n always

Funny SMS-67.

So sweet is ur SMILE…..
So sweet is ur STYLE…..
So sweet is ur VOICE…..
So sweet is ur EYE…….
See how sweetly I LIE!!

Funny SMS-68.

U r a DONKEY

D 4 decent
O 4 outstanding
N 4 nice
K 4 kind
E 4 excellent
Y 4 youthful

Funny SMS-69.

Positive thinking is a bit like this: a little bird in the sky, u look up n it’s shit in ur eyes, u dont mind, u dont cry, u just thank god that cows don’t fly!

Funny SMS-70.

Just go 2 hell
yes u
u only !
because
only u can change
hell into heaven
by ur sweetness.!

Funny sms Collection-15

Funny SMS-71.

A person who surrenders when he’s WRONG, is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE, is WISE..
A person who surrenders even if he’s RIGHT, is a HUSBAND.!

Funny SMS-72.

Its funny when people discuss over “love marriage” n “arranged marriage”
It is like asking a person if he would like 2 “hang himself” or “shoot himself”.

Funny SMS-73.

World’s Shortest Horror Story By “Martin Garner”
Contains Only The Following Lines..
“When The World’s Last Man
Was Alone In His Room,
The Door Was Knocked.”

Funny SMS-74.

Do u know,why 14 november is celebrated as childrens day?bcoz it cums just after 9 month of valentine day.

Funny SMS-75.

"I LOVE U." Send this SMS 2 10 Girls & win free trip 2 ur nearest police station in luxury Jeep, Food, Accommodation &body massage free. *OFFER LIMITED*

Funny sms Collection-16

Funny SMS-76.

India is empty without Taj-mahal, sundarbon is empty without tigher, Man is empty without love, But Zoo is empty without u.

Funny SMS-77.

I am ur real friend. If u give me 1, I will return u 10. If u give me a pen I will return u train. If u give me ur girlfriend I will return her with some children.

Funny SMS-78.

Keep contact with me & win exciting prizes. >3rd prize-lots of love. >2nd prize-life time Friendship. > 1st prize-free stay in my heart. Offer valid till I am alive......

Funny SMS-79.

A man went 4 blood test. Nurse took his blood. But she didn't find any cotton. So she suck his finger. The man became happy n said would I have Urine test next time?

Funny SMS-80.

I want 2 suck it... lick it... wanna move my tongue all over it... wanna feel it in my mouth...yep, it is my ice-cream & that's how I...eat..... ice-cream !

Funny sms Collection-17

Funny SMS-81.

I need u...
I love u...
I can't go anywhere
without u...

Oh My Lovely..
Shoes!

Funny SMS-82.

Consequences of American life style: The wife rushed into house screaming 2 her husband, Darling, Come quick! Ur kids n my kids r beating our kids.

Funny SMS-83.

Twinkle twinkle little star,
u should know what u r,
n once u know what u r,
Mental hospital is not so far.

Funny SMS-84.

If I ever go 4 a brain transplant I’d like 2 use ur brain. It's not because u r a genius. I would only like a brain that has never been used.

Funny SMS-85.

Q: Why do men fart more often than women?
A: Because women do not keep their mouth shut long enough 2 build up the pressure.

Funny sms Collection-18

Funny SMS-86.

U R 100% beautiful,
U R 100% lovely,
U R 100% sweet,
U R 100% nice, n
U R 100% stupid 2 believe these words...

Funny SMS-87.

Newton's law of Love:-

Love can neither be created nor be destroyed;
it can only be changed from
one girl friend 2 another...

Funny SMS-88.

Never hold ur farts in. They travel up ur spine, into ur brain n that's where u get ur shitty ideas from!

Funny SMS-89.

In life 5 things can come at any time...
Money
friendship

Love
death

n
????

MY SMS.
Have a nice day!

Funny SMS-90

Luv
Easy 2 say - Difficult 2 stay...
Beautiful 2 feel - Difficult 2 deal...
Difficulty is a part of Life...
But that’s the reason...
Why Girlfriend is never a wife?

Funny sms Collection-19

Funny SMS-91

Girl: Will u love me after marriage also?
Boy: This depends on ur husband, if he allows me.

Funny SMS-92.

Q:Whats the difference between magnets n women

A: magnets have a positive side

Funny SMS-93.

I'm shocked 2 know, i'm really upset.
I dont know how 2 inform U.

Bt I've 2 let U know dat U've symptoms of
A-I-D-S
(Adoring, Intelligent, Dear, Sweet) !!

Funny SMS-94.

Life is full of beautiful things:
soft sunsets,
painted rainbows
delicate blossoms
luv & laughter
quiet moments &
fantastic people like me

Take care

Funny SMS-95.

Last night some Monkeys came running 2 my room.They wanted 2 trouble good people... I suggested ur name.They said Oh!!!No we can t disturb our Boss...

Funny sms Collection-20

Funny sms-96.

We’ve known....each other for....quite a while now, do u think we can b more.... than friends? coz I like u very much. Will u b my partner 2... rob a bank?

Funny sms-97.
Ur validity of being my friend is going 2 b expired today,plz recharge ur friendship immodestly by delivering 4-5 sweet & cool msgs. So hurry

Funny sms-98.

Handsome,
Sweet,
Intelligent, Spontaneous,
Good Looking,
Nice Friends, Charming,
Funny, well... Enough about ME! How about you?

Funny sms-99.

Who's hot... Its U,
Who's
Charming... Its U,
Who's
Sweetest.. Its U,
Who's
Intelligent... Its U,
Who's dear & near friend... Its U
Who's a liar.. Its me!

Funny sms-100.

Some One
Is Loving you
Caring for you
Watching over you
Protecting you
Guess Who?

it’s ur Dog!